Preseason power rankings

Finallllly...the power rankings have come baaaaack to fantasy baseball!

Here are your 2012 preseason power rankings, presented in haiku form. Don't get your panties in a bunch if I said something negative, because that's the theme here.


1) Michelle Beadle
Defending champ talks
a big game; how'd that work for
Bob last year? Zip it.

2) Billy Ball
Catcher in seventh,
and then closer in Round 8.
Some risky business.

3) Bombers or Bums?
Dumb draft strategy?
Players who didn't play last year.
Kendry and Johan.

4) Ahh Harro
No more excuses.
Better make playoffs this year.
High expectations.

5) Cole Miners
Hoping to channel
'10 - hitters and manager.
Would not count on it.

6) Brother Socko
Gordon, Weeks, Martinez,
Cain and Milone; relying way
too much on prospects

7) Charlene Murphy?
Lacking big boppers
on hot corners; pitching depth
very concerning

8) PumpinFistsSince86
Once-proud manager
now past his prime. See you in
the draft lottery.

9) DUIs & MRIs
No auto-draft, no
three-way trade - back near basement!
That's where you belong.

10) Turd n the punchbowl
Playoff drought at two;
no doubt in my mind that it
will increase to three.

11) Fireballs12
Carpenter, Hudson
and Oswalt? Why aren't you in
rebuilding mindset?

12) Gettin Wiggy Wit It
Pitching staff truly
one of the worst assembled
in league history